Escort and UK Adultzone writer Redhotrio chats to Mary, a Liverpool escort lady who uses female domme escorts to satisfy her urge for hardcore BDSM.
Mary, 47, has always lived her life being under pressure and in positions of authority.
Redhotrio: Tell me about you.
Mary: Before I got pregnant with my first child, I was a paralegal and was always working long hours and was stressed a lot of the time. I was married, I’m divorced now, and I have three kids. My children are now at university. My husband and I had really s**t sex. I’m naturally submissive and because I always had to do everything like clean the house, look after the kids and my husband, the need to be dominated grew even more.
RHR: So, you got divorced because you had s**t sex?
M: That and because sexually we were too similar. He also wanted to be submissive in the bedroom. That doesn’t work, you need one of you to be dominant or switch. People say that sex isn’t everything in a relationship, but I am a very sexual person so for me it is a huge part of it and if the spark isn’t there then you’re not compatible.
RHR: What attracts you to the BDSM scene?
M: I like pain and I like to be punished. It’s my kink. I want someone else to be in charge and humiliate me, telling me I am worthless whilst they cane me. I like being edged especially if I’m bound, using a sex machine or a strap on.
RHR: And you prefer a woman to do it?
M: Yes. I would never want to have proper lesbian sex or a relationship with a woman, I’m not gay, but I just think that women are more vicious and I think what attracts me is the heels and latex or PVC outfits. It’s like hardcore dress up. I get off on a woman wearing a strap on and f***ing me. It’s just wild and unusual and it’s like the dominant female is shaming me because I am a weak female (sexually) and is punishing me, if that makes sense.
RHR: For you it is the ultimate humiliation.
M: Yes, completely. It is the only thing that has made me feel complete passion.
RHR: What made you decide to use escorts? Why not go to a sex club?
M: Using an escort is so much easier. You can pick one you like the look of and who has experience so you will be getting exactly the type of thing that you are looking for. If I went to a sex club, it would be too softcore and with someone who may say they are into the same thing just to get me into bed, and as I said I don’t f**k girls. Paying for it means you will get the best meet with someone who does this daily, not someone playing at it. They will be dedicated because it’s their job.
RHR: That’s why men book escorts I expect, to do what a “normal” girl can’t or won’t. M: Exactly! I don’t understand the stigma and fear that some men have by admitting that they use escorts. They don’t want to confirm that they pay for it because it bruises their ego and they don’t want people to think they are less of a man because they haven’t got it for free. That’s ridiculous really. It’s business and you are doing a transaction with someone who is providing a service, you’re not in a relationship with them. But because it’s a sexual service, some men want a connection to feel valid. For me I’m just looking for sex and hardcore pain. I don’t care about feelings or things like that.
Everyone knows except my close family, and whilst some critcise me, my friends are actually in awe and commend me for doing what I want and not giving a damn.
RHR: You mentioned negative comments. What were they?
M: People told me I was a pervert and funded prostitution and that I should be helping women get out of the sex industry not ensuring that they stay in it. Every domme I have seen has chosen this life and makes a good living from it. They don’t understand why I use sex workers because I’m a woman, but that’s sexist. Escorts shouldn’t be for male use only or to have threesomes or moresomes with a man and their female partner. Women shouldn’t be stigmatised because they want to see a female escort one on one.
RHR: Agreed. I think you are very brave and show that you are a powerful woman. I know you are submissive, but this whole situation is far from that. It’s liberating and an inspiration to other girls who may want to use an escort but are scared to.
M: Thank you! Girls who want to see girls should be advertised more. There is a whole underground market for it. My domme sees a couple of women who hide the fact that they go to her from their husbands. Most women see escorts with their partner, not solo. If a woman wants sexual pleasure, then why shouldn’t she have it.
RHR: Because her husband or boyfriend would get jealous if they knew the truth! M: HAHA spot on!
RHR: Do you think that you will ever have another long term relationship? M: If I did, he would have to let me carry on using female escorts. I can’t get what I desire from a man even though relationship wise I’d want a man as a partner. They would have to be very understanding and men as a whole are often very possessive of their partners. I’m hoping he exists out there somewhere. If not, I am happy as I am. I do get a little lonely, but I have lots of great friends and my children come and stay with me for a couple of days during the holidays.
RHR: And your children don’t know that you use escorts?
M: God no! I’m very open about it, but there are certain things that you don’t share with your close family and one of them is your sex life. I expect that they have their own sex lives now, which I never ask them about. They deserve their privacy, as do I.
RHR: What has been your most memorable experience using escorts?
M: It was with the domme I see now. I tried a few different women in the beginning to find the one that could cater for my extreme tastes. We did a couple of sessions where I was flogged and edged, building up trust so she could put me in her sensory deprivation chamber. It’s a bit like a coffin. You go in, are bound and breath through a pipe that is fed through the lid. You can’t see or hear, it’s the ultimate in caged humiliation. Just laying there alone in the dark makes me climax. I have been in the box several times now. My domme is amazing. I feel so safe and she is always coming up with new ideas to push my limits. She says I test her imagination and that she has never met someone who can take such a hardcore session, especially with me being female.
RHR: Do your sessions help with your mental well being?
M: Absolutely. It is strange, but being in these uncomfortable situations actually calms me and releases stress. It has enhanced my life.
If you, like Mary, are a female wanting to try out a domme experience in Liverpool check out the escorts below.
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